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Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Dating Ideas From Inexpensive to Expensive

The first date is not just about restaurants and movies. Here are some great first date ideas starting with the very cheap, more expensive to the extravagant:

1. Beach - Take a picnic, a bottle of wine and a rug, and spend the day catching the sun together. Or, you could take a dip together - all that splashing about is bound to be great fun.

2. Picnic by a river - Prepare a basket of goodies, a chilled bottle of wine and enjoy the day relaxing in each other's company.

3. The movies - Let your date choose the film. It will show good gesture if you don’t have the same taste in films.

4. Theme Park - Big or small, everybody loves theme parks. Triple loop roller coasters, dodgems, candy floss - the ideal date for the big kid in us.

5. Eat in - Show off your culinary skills and ask them round for dinner. Don’t overdo the candles and music, or you may frighten them away.

6. Indoor ice skating, or rollerblading in the park - You can lean against each other for balance and warmth.

7. A sporting activity that you both like.

8. Kite flying - My partner and I did this a few year back. It wasn’t our first date, but it was one of the best days we have ever spent together.

9. A trip to the zoo - Everyone likes animals so a trip to the zoo makes for a perfect date.

10. Local museum or art gallery - This is only a good idea if you are both interested in museums.

Expensive Date Ideas

1. Go to a concert - Take them to see their favorite band in concert and dance the night away.

2. Go for an expensive meal - Have her serenaded by one of the waiters with a bottle of champagne and a dozen red roses.

3. Go horseback riding - Take a trip to the nearest horse farm. Spend the afternoon horse riding and stopping to take in the scenery, and afternoon lunch in a local inn.

4. Candlelit dinner for two aboard a yacht - Take her out to sea. Put on the full works - captain sailing, champagne on ice and lobsters for dinner.

5. Take in a show - Get dressed up for the evening and go along to watch one of your favorite shows at a theater house. Or go to a premier of a big block buster movie.

6. Horse drawn carriage at night - Take a trip around the city and through the park, on a horse drawn carriage. Have it take you to a swanky restaurant and wait while you dine.

7. Under the sea - Go scuba diving.

8. Take to the sky - Go for a trip in a hot air balloon.

9. A trip to New York for the afternoon - Fly her to New York and back in an afternoon. This is the ultimate first date destination (especially if it is her first time there).

10. On top of the world - Prepare a basket of caviar, prawn cocktail, strawberries and cream, and champagne on ice, and take to the skies. Well, the top of the highest building you can get to.

Extravagant Date Ideas

1. Fly her to Paris and back - Take in all the sights that Paris has to offer. Finish the date with an expensive meal in one of the swanky restaurants in Paris.

2. Helicopter ride - Go for a flight over the city in a helicopter.

3. We're in the money - Dress up to the nines and go blow a fortune in a top casino.

4. Parachute jump - Take to the sky for the high of a lifetime. This one cannot be a surprise date, unless you are sure it is what they want!

5. Climb to the top of the world - Go mounting climbing on a clear summer's day. Don't forget the flag for when you reach the top.

6. Go swimming with dolphins - This has to be the ultimate experience of a lifetime and if you aim to impress, this is the way to do it.

7. Para-gliding - Take to the sea, have lunch, then the skies the limit.

8. Eating in - Hire a top chef and waiting staff, and have them round to your place for a meal they won’t forget.

First Dates: First Date Do's & Dont's

First dates can be nerve wracking, and they often render even the most experienced of daters shy, silent and prone to making awkward and embarrassing mistakes that blow the chances of getting a second date even before the initial meeting is over. Here are some pointers to help you put your most attractive foot forward and make a good impression.

Do's

1. Do be on time. The last thing you want to do is make a bad impression on your date by being late. Tardiness implies that you don't care. Even worse, the person you're meeting may not hang around to wait for you to turn up.

2. Do make your partner feel comfortable. We're all a bit on edge during a first date with someone. Trying to put your partner at ease and get him or her to relax will also help you stay calm and enjoy yourself.

3. Do be an interesting date. The worst thing you can do is show up for a date with someone and then sit there all night and talk about nothing -- or, even worse, stay so silent that they might as well have eaten dinner alone. Don't make yourself easy to forget.

4. Do laugh at their jokes. Even if you've heard the joke 100 times or more (or it just isn't funny at all), laughing along with your date will communicate that you are interested in them.

5. Do keep the conversation alive. That dreaded silence, during which you're both scrambling to come up with something -- anything -- to say, can seem to last for eternity and will make both of you think the other person is boring. Jot down a few questions ahead of time. Practicing for the date can make all the difference.

6. Do take an interest in your date. Listen when he or she is talking. Be interested in what they have to say, and show how interested you are by asking questions about what they like to do, read, eat for dinner, etc.

7. Do go somewhere unique. First dates don't have to be to the movies or to a restaurant for a nice meal. You will make a longer, lasting impression if you get creative.

8. Do be confident. Confidence says a lot about a person. Being more confident will help you get through that first date with ease and let your partner know you're comfortable with who you are.

9. Do be yourself. You won't fool anyone by pretending to be someone you're not. Also, if you're planning to continue seeing this person, the real you will come out eventually, so you might as well start off by introducing them to who you really are, flaws and all.

10. Do stay safe. Take your cell phone with you, plan to drive yourself and let a friend know where you're going, who you'll be with and when you'll be back.

Don'ts

1. Don't be late. First impressions count, and if you're late, this will make your date think you're lazy and didn't care enough to plan ahead.

2. Don't talk about yourself all night. There is nothing worse then a person that loves to talk about herself all the time. How vain can you get?

3. Don't talk about past relationships. Maybe that's how you lost the last one. Nobody wants to hear you drone on about your ex and what she did or didn't do. Concentrate on this new person, and see if you can get to the second date.

4. Don't eat with your mouth open. It's gross. Your date is there to see you, not your food.

5. Don't bombard your date with extremely personal questions. Like you, they probably don't want to reveal too much about themselves just yet. If you like each other and want to continue the relationship after this first meeting, there will be plenty of time to ask questions and delve deeper.

6. Don't try to be someone you're not. So he likes dogs, but you're a cat person. Pretending otherwise will only make the other person feel deceived and turned off when they discover the truth. Find someone who wants you for you, not for who you're pretending to be.

7. Don't forget to thank the other person for the date. This is not only good manners but also gives you a chance to end it, if you're not interested -- or to ask them out on another date, if you are.

8. Don't propose marriage or kids, unless you never want to see that person again.

9. Don't pursue sex after your partner has said no. Period. It's tacky, and it proves you're a jerk.

10. Don't get drunk! As much as drinking copious of alcohol to calm your nerves sounds like a good idea, think about how bad you're going to feel if you miss most of your date because you're in the bathroom revisiting your meal. Additionally, this kind of behavior will show your love interest that you can't control yourself and don’t know your limits. It also isn't safe -- getting drunk and lowering your inhibitions is likely to put you at risk of unwanted advances, and you won't be in the right frame of mind or body to do anything about them.

Potential Partners: What We Look For In Mates

Dating can be as tricky a business as can trying to find a date. When we begin dating, we often forget to consider what we are looking for in others we would like to meet. We set off with a definite view of the perfect dating partner. The moment we are introduced to someone, or view some photos of profiles or personal ads online – we forget everything! Why is this? Because we are swayed by many factors, in other words, we are not as set in our ways as much as we like to think we are.

Beauty, of course, often holds sway. However much we like to say we are not, there are few of us who wouldn’t date someone attractive. It is in our blood and we would usually say yes to an attractive person. Beauty tends to rub off on those around it, so if we associate ourselves with what we consider are good looks we immediately feel good about ourselves also. Most of us are not models and therefore we tend not to meet those who are but we notice it in the things around us. If you can appreciate something beautiful, then you can also appreciate someone beautiful. To ignore it is a lie.

However, if we simply lived and dated by beauty alone we would be too shallow to succeed in any real sense. We would have 2 dimensional personalities and be uninteresting in any meaningful way. It is often leveled as a criticism in attractive people that they don’t have very strong personalities because they have traded on their looks for too long. Conversely, a conventionally unattractive person can often have a strong and interesting personality to make up for the lack of attractiveness in a physical sense. So it’s clear that as an isolating factor beauty (or more specifically, physical attraction) is to some extent important but it is not the only important thing when dating others.

We look for humor in a person because we want them to feel good by being with us and we want them to feel good about themselves in their decisions. We also want ourselves to feel good and to relax and have fun and a great time. Therefore when we date someone, humor is a must if we are going to ever reach a level of relaxation in the company of that person. Laughter and humor is about creating a mental connection and understanding about the world around us. It is a demonstration of a commonly accepted set of beliefs between us and it allows a demonstration of a level of understanding quickly not known in almost any other form.
When dating others, we look for eye contact upon meeting because it is the most direct sense of understanding and truth and honesty. We almost always look at each other’s eyes first when we meet as this is where we first find attraction. It is beyond me here to explain why that may be but I do like the expression that our eyes are the gateway to the soul. I tend to agree. The smallest change in the glint of our eye conveys so many emotions and it is thus that we first begin our instant relationship.

When dating others we look for common understanding and acceptance. We do not seek partners as judges but as part of our own emotional support system. We like to admire and to be admired, however subtly. In another parlance, we would say that we appreciate and like being appreciated. Either way, we enjoy the company of another because we make each other feel good about themselves. It’s an unspoken understanding. Where relationships begin to crack later is where the understanding and support is replaced by criticism due to internal frustrations of lack of support. Initially when we date, this understanding and acceptance is displayed through many different methods from conversation and laughter in agreement on a topic, to agreement in places to visit on dates and food to eat, drinks to consume, movies to go see etc. It’s all part of agreeing based on a common understanding, finding the common ground between us.

We look for honesty and truth when dating. It can be like one long test, especially when we are not new to the dating game and have had our fingers burned previously. We know that it is within everyone to embellish the truth and unfortunately part of the dating ritual is to talk ourselves up, so sell ourselves as worthy. When this happens we must be careful not to go too far and add things that are untrue. Later our burgeoning relationship could fall apart through such white lies. And yet there are too few of us who stick 100% to the truth alone. There will come a point when we all add in some substance to our conversations to help our image to our date and to be honest this can all be part of the fun. But the basis of honesty has to be maintained when dating otherwise it is a pointless exercise. We are looking to share our quality time with someone so let’s be truthful from the outset.

There is an argument that when we are dating we are seeking someone like ourselves, a reflection of what we already feel about ourselves and the world around us. I think that is a mistaken view. I think what this theory really means is that we want to love and be loved and to allow this to happen we hope to find someone who not only matches some set of important criteria that we set ourselves but also someone who sees the world as we do. Not exactly perhaps, but close enough that we can grow further both as individuals and as a couple.

Quick Dating Tips

If you like some one you may have to ask them for a date. For men this is standard practice and for women, this process is becoming increasingly common. If you are thinking of asking someone on a date consider the following quick dating tips:

1. Why are you asking them out, is it for the right reasons and what do you expect as a result of them saying yes or no?

2. Be prepared that the person you ask may say no and in which case do not take the rejection personally.

3. When asking someone out choose your moment carefully and practise what you might say in advance so that you don't appear tongue-tied.

4. If the person you ask says yes, ensure you already have thought of a place, date and time for the date so that you display signs of thoughtfulness.

5. Be prepared for the person asking why you want to date them so that you are able to flatter and create a sense of trust immediately. People can be wary and they may want to know some reasosn behind your request. Better, anticipate this by saying "would you like to come to dinner, I have always thought you are great fun..".

6. Make sure that your request for a date does not pressurize the person in any way. If they want to think about it, let them. But don't chase.

7. Make sure that when you ask someone on a date you smile and keep things fun and happy. Being confident and smiley will elicit a far more positive response.

8. Always have an alternative date and time or location in mind should the person be unsure of their diary. Giving a person a choice is often a marketing masterstroke.

9. If the person says no, don't chase for a reason, simply move on. They may think about things and get back to you with a yes response later.

10. If you ask someone on a date, make sure that you actually intend to go through with it. Standing people up is not allowed.

11. If you are being asked out don't play games. If you need time to consider the offer then say so. If you want to say no, say no. But do not keep someone hanging on for no reason. You wouldn't like the situation if it was reversed.

12. Try to avoid dutch-courage such as using alcohol to boost your courage levels as this will often backfire.

13. Don't ask someone out when they are in a group of friends. Timing is everything.

Safe Dating Tips for Single Women and Men

Online dating is generally extremely safe because it is distance dating and lets you get to know your potential matches anonymously before you meet in person. This makes most people feel more comfortable and also allows you to pace yourself and be selective (which you should be).

However, there are still some basic safety rules for online dating you should observe before giving out personal contact information to a relative strangers or arranging to meet them. Even though everything is online, it's still easy to get carried away, so take things slow. These tips may seem obvious, but following them will ensure your safety and make sure you have only good online dating experiences. And you never know: Mr. or Miss Right might be just around the corner!
  • Always trust your instinct -- after all, it's gotten you this far in life already
  • Take your time and look at lots of different profiles to get a feel for what kind of person you want
  • Never publish your phone number or email address
  • Don't take anything at face value -- it's easy to lie online, and many people do
  • Ask lots of questions when chatting with your potential mates
  • Make sure you feel comfortable with whoever you are chatting with, at all times
  • If someone is abusive or rude, block them immediately
  • Don't give your home or work address to anyone you have not met in person
  • Before agreeing to a date, make sure you know as much about the other person as possible
  • Don't allow yourself to be talked into anything -- you're the one in charge
  • Take your time to get to know someone -- don't be rushed
  • A patient person will be happy to wait until you are ready to meet
  • Make sure anyone you're talking to is willing to provide photos and information about himself or herself
  • Ask your date to leave a message on your voicemail beforehand, if possible
  • Chat on the phone for a while before arranging a date
  • Always meet in a well-lit public place
  • Always tell a good friend where you are going and who you're meeting
  • If possible, step away and call a friend during the date to confirm that everything is ok
  • Always carry a cell phone on a date
  • Schedule lunch dates -- they're convenient and they have a time limit
  • Always make your own travel arrangements to/from a first date
  • Do not accept a ride home on the first date or reveal your address
  • If you're traveling far, always make and confirm your own hotel arrangements
  • Make sure you have as much information about your date as possible
  • Keep your first date to a specified time limit so you always have an "exit" point
  • Never feel like you owe it to someone to meet them -- you don't!
These rules might seem like overkill, but the reality is that you are introducing yourself to complete strangers and should definitely take precautions. Following these and other safe dating strategies will make sure you can relax and enjoy yourself safely and without the fear that someone will take advantage of you.

Top Tips for Finding A Date

"Find a date," your friends say. "Join us for dinner, and bring a date!" This alone is enough to cause many single people to immediately start to panic. The reality is that, if you're looking for dates, you probably just want to find someone special to spend time with, without regard for your pushy friends and their need for additional couples to complete their circle. It's important to think of looking for dates as part of life, part of your everyday routine. You never know -- one of these days it may well turn into something more than just a date.

Finding a date is never easy, but it can be relatively painless, depending on your attitude.

Maybe have a hard time meeting people. Maybe you have a hard time meeting people who are suitable for dating. Maybe you're a single parent with responsibilities at home, or someone who works from home. Perhaps you work strange hours and that's why you never meet anyone to date. Maybe you work with people much younger or older, or perhaps you really don't have finely honed social skills. It could be that you're shy, private, quiet in groups or just unwilling to make the first move.

Whatever the situation, you need to take action! The first thing to do is make sure you exude self confidence. You want to find a date you'll have a great time with, so it helps to make him or her feel special by looking good. Here are some tips on how to accomplish this:
  • Give yourself a makeover
  • Buy some new clothes and update your image
  • Get a new haircut or hairstyle
  • Get a full beauty treatment and makeover
  • Visit your dentist and get those teeth pearly white
  • Get a tan and freshen your skin
  • Try out the latest styles and fashions
  • Treat yourself to a rejuvenating vacation or break
  • Read some new magazines and go shopping
  • Join a health club and get into a new workout routine
  • Go on a diet and lose a few pounds, if needed
  • Take martial arts or self defense classes
  • Improve your attitude
The next thing you need to do to find a date is think long and hard about what you really want to achieve and what your expectations are. Get clear about what kind of person you're looking for, although don't be too specific. Keeping your aim as broad as you can will make finding a date easier. You also need to be realistic. Don't make it your goal to date a Hollywood movie star if it's not likely to happen. Keep your feet on the ground and take a long, hard look at your own life before walking into someone else's. Once you've got that part down, here are a few ways to get started:

Dating Close to Home

Begin by looking in your own neighborhood. Is there anyone in your neighborhood or friend group who is single and awesome? Often, people stay single simply because they aren't being asked out by anyone, not because they themselves are lonely. It's time to do the asking. And yes, that includes the good-looking people in this world. There are lots of local clubs and activity centers where singles are likely to congregate. These are often the best place to introduce yourself to people of the opposite sex in your community. Try to choose something that involves both sexes.

Dating at Work

Some sources claim that 87% of couples first met through work or began dating at work. In general, dating at work or dating someone within your own office environment is generally not a good idea due to the possibilities for problems and the negative implications it can have on your career. Relationship tensions within an office can cause issues with other workers and antagonize work-related disputes.

However, the good news is, most organizations also work with other firms. If your office gets together to socialize with business partners or groups of people you don't work with directly, start going to these events. Try going with coworkers to happy hour or attending after-work social events, too, from bowling to trips to bars and comedy clubs. It's as much about making new friends as it is about finding a date.

If you really don't like your coworkers (or don't have any because, for example, you work from home), you'll need to look for other ways to extend your social circle.

Get Physical

That's right, join a gym. To find a date, you should look your best. After all, if you've set your sights high, doesn't your potential date deserve the best, too? Good, so get down to the local health club and look into a regular workout routine. If already do this, expand your horizons and make sure you're not going to a unisex gym. Try other sports and activities -- from yachting to running to baseball to anything else you haven't tried before. You will make fabulous new friends, as well as possibly finding a date, not to mention feeling and looking much better than if you just sat on the couch munching on potato chips.

Ask Your Friends

The most common complaint among people in their late '20s and '30s is that all their friends are married. If this is true for you, it's time to adapt. As awesome as they might be, your married friends probably will not help you find a date. They tell you they'll try, and they probably mean it, but like attracts like, and there's a good chance most of their friends are married, too. In general, you should not look to any friends to help you find a date, though, because your friends don't necessarily know what kind of person you're looking for. The best advice is to take control and find a date yourself.

This is why you need some single friends. Newsflash: Dating is easier if you hang out with other singles who are also playing the dating game. Even if your married friends are your best buddies in the whole wide world, you need support from other people who know what you're going through. Also, there is safety in large groups. This can also open up new places and venues for you to visit and look for potential dates. You will probably see your confidence level jump as well.

You can find new single friends everywhere: at work, in your neighborhood, at clubs, in your gym … You simply need to make some new friends, then join in. It's not nearly as hard as you think. One thing's for sure: Neither your fantastic new friends, nor your super hot new girlfriend or boyfriend is hiding out in your closet. If you sit at home, you will not find them -- you have to go out and put yourself out there in order to do it. In fact, get started right now. When was the last time you called up your old friends to catch up? Do it now.

Join a Club

Activities really do bring people together and help you make new friends. If you're involved in something like a craft, hobby or sport, then you've already taken the first step toward hanging out with (and possibly dating) like-minded individuals. You have something in common, and it's a great icebreaker. If you're not a member of any club, figure out what you're interested in and decide whether joining a group of some sort centered around this activity might introduce you to others. (Hint: It will!) Always remember: Statistically, there is a good chance that many people just like you are also looking for dates and are joining clubs like these for this very same reason.

Signing up for a Dating Agency

Dating agencies were once associated with embarrassing social stigmas, but not anymore. These days, it's extremely trendy to use an agency to find dates. Dating and finding a date is fun and enjoyable. After all, dating is really just about meeting new people and searching for a special connection. Dating agencies fall into two categories: traditional and Web-based. The first are those traditional dating agencies that help you find a date but charge hundreds of dollars to offer you the chance to meet a few people in their database they have matched you with. They then offer you the chance to meet, if both parties are interested. It's slow and long-winded, but it can work sometimes, although rarely are there guarantees of any kind. The main thing about such dating agencies is that they often specialize in a certain area -- maybe profession or financial, etc. Some may concentrate on the medical or legal profession; others may focus on, say, executives in a certain region.

Internet Dating Sites

The second kind of agency is the professional Internet dating and friendship sites accessible from your home computer. Most often, they are free to sign up for, so you can set up a profile and see who's in their database to find out if you're interested in that kind of people. The beauty of Internet dating is that it makes everyone on any given site instantly accessible, and you can search for people you match with in comfort of your own home without spending a dime. Sniff around, check out people's pics and profiles and take your time finding a date.
It's super important when you're looking for a date to choose a reputable Internet dating site that will provide you with not only personal ads but also a safe and secure environment, as well as advice and articles to help you get ahead. These sites let you communicate anonymously with your matches when you're ready to make contact via on-site email, chat rooms and private instant messaging. Some companies even include voicemail services so you can listen to your prospective date's voice before meeting them.

After paying a small fee, you can communicate with as many members as you like, safely and securely -- and, very soon, you may find that you have arranged not just one but many dates. It's up to you. No more standing in singles bars, being hit on by obnoxious strangers or brainstorming opening lines -- just convenient and relaxed dating, whenever you want!

If you're looking for dates, you should start immediately. It's not always easy to take a step like this if you've been out of the dating arena for years. Think through these tips on meeting dates and start taking initiative. Life is meant for living, but even more importantly, it's meant for sharing with someone special. Start focusing on finding a date, but more importantly, focus on feeling good about yourself and the rest will follow.

Dating Ideas - Great Places to Date

When faced with the prospect of coming up with dating ideas, it is always amazing how quickly one's creative energies can take on the attributes of the Sahara Desert. Yes, Saturday and Sunday need to be filled as does Tuesday evening. What have you thought of so far? Zilch!

Ironically, while our minds are buzzing with ideas, they are usually and not appropriate in this instance. You could have thought of flying to Niagara Falls for dinner, ballooning over Paris at dawn or swimming naked together by moonlight in your local pool. But weeks later, with a new date on the phone, you can think of absolutely nothing at all. Worse still, you have no preference, and start using phrases like, "No, that's fine. Whatever you like. It's up to you. You decide."

Stop right there. There is a danger here of appearing completely useless and about to fall at the first hurdle, so it's time to get your thinking caps on. It's time for dating ideas. Of course dating ideas differ depending on whether it is first date, second date or so on. Maybe you are hoping that the third date will be spent in bed, but lets not get ahead of ourselves. For now, we will stick to social functions and activities our parents would approve of.

The key to dating in the early stages is keeping it manageable, relatively inexpensive, and within manageable timelines. Particularly on a first date, you may wish to leave early, or so may they. An exit plan for both guys and girls is always useful. After the initial date, the key to good dating ideas is to make them sociable, relaxed, fun, public and open-ended. Let's face it -- why stop a date that is really going well. That is why I favor lunch for first dates. Lunchtimes are good because they have predetermined time restrictions and can be abandoned if necessary with little harm done. Saturday afternoons are great for a second date because that allows both parties extra time if things are going really well.

So with this in mind, here are some ideas for keeping things fun, real and enjoyable. Make your own list for your own city so that you have some ideas in advance. Always have a good food guide and know some nice daytime places to visit.

First Date
  • Lunchtime convenient coffee shop
  • Lunchtime restaurant
  • Early evening restaurant
Second Date
  • Weekend walk in the park and lunch
  • The zoo and lunch
  • Ice skating or bowling
  • Dinner and a movie
  • Ballgame or sports event and lunch
  • Art gallery or museums
Third Date
  • Amusement or adventure park
  • Water park
  • Beach visit and lunch
  • Tourist attraction
  • Theater and dinner
  • Adventure activity

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Dating Rules

No one ever said dating was easy. First dates are awkward, second dates are expectant and the dates that follow that -- during which two people really start getting down to the business of getting to know each other -- present hundreds, if not thousands, of opportunities for missteps, faux pas, blunders and mistakes. That is to say nothing of the myriad chances for problems to which you could fall prey while arranging, planning and preparing for dates.

We call too often or not enough, we're too available or never around, we wear sandals to fancy restaurants, laugh hysterically at bad jokes, show up with blue carnations, gab on our cell phones during dinner and commit countless other dating crimes, mostly without realizing we’re doing it. No doubt about it -- bad dating behavior is a rampant affliction, and it's time to cure it with some common sense advice.

If dating is a game, then just like any other game, there are rules you need to study, learn and follow. After all, you wouldn't take the field without knowing where the base lines are, would you? (For those of you who are immune to ball field metaphors, the answer is "no.") While none of these do's and don'ts are set in stone -- and, as your mother told you, there are obviously exceptions to every rule -- here we attempt to equip you with an idiot-proof playbook for the fast-paced, intense, exciting, full-contact sport of searching for someone with whom to fall in love.

Dating Rules -- Do's

1. Do try to always look your best and be punctual. Showing up late or looking messy gives the impression that you don't care -- and, if that's the case, why go out with this person in the first place?

2. Do try to enjoy yourself on dates. Yes, finding your soul mate is serious business, and it can sometimes even be a scary endeavor, but keep in mind that this is supposed to be fun.

3. Do compliment your date on how he or she looks. Men and women tend to put a lot of effort into getting ready for a date, and it's nice (and flattering) to hear that all that energy paid off.

4. Do be interested and interesting. Ask questions, share insights and pay attention when your date is telling you what they like to do, read, watch, listen to, etc.

5. Do tell someone directly if you're not interested in seeing them again. Lying and stringing people along simply because you're too scared to tell them the truth is selfish and hurtful. If you don't want to go on another date with someone, let them down as gently -- but firmly -- as possible.

6. Do date only people you're attracted to, no matter what your friends say. Approval by your peers doesn't prove a thing.

7. Do stay positive, even when dates don't end well. It is most certainly true that you will date a few frogs before you find a prince. Along the way, you will probably meet some pretty nice people.

8. Do plan ahead. Dating is a creative diversion that requires concentration and energy, so make arrangements ahead of time and let your date know you put some thought into the evening.

9. Do be proactive about finding people to date. The man or woman you've been searching for your whole life is probably not going to come ring your doorbell and beg you to go to dinner anytime soon. Dating requires action, so get out there and meet as many people as you can.

10. Do surround yourself with positive, like-minded people who are dating, too. Part of the fun of dating is celebrating, comparing notes and commiserating with your friends. Surround yourself with positive people who are rooting for you to succeed at love and will be there for you if/when you need emotional support.

Dating Rules -- Don'ts

1. Don't call, text message or email someone you've just started seeing more than once a day unless they reply (or in the event of an emergency). Desperation and instability are major turnoffs.

2. Don't date the kind of people who've hurt you in the past. Many of us are attracted to people who are bad for us, but it's important to break these patterns and seek out healthy relationships with matches who won't demean you or make you feel bad about yourself in any way.

3. Don't be late for a date. It's just rude. If you have to change your plans, give the other person as much notice and consideration as possible. And always apologize.

4. Don't lie to your date or about any aspect of your life, even if the truth isn't as sexy or you're worried they won't like it. It would be awful to ruin a potentially life-changing relationship with your perfect match because of some silly lie you told early on to impress him or her.

5. Don't be too available. We don't mean you should play games, but if you're free every night, you're probably not taking care of yourself, pursuing your own interests and spending time with your friends -- which means you're probably not very interesting to talk to. People with full, exciting lives make the best dates.

6. Don't give away too much about yourself at the beginning. Revealing your innermost secrets on the second date can lead to rejection. Don't be scared to open up, but remember that getting to know someone takes time, and you should let your relationship evolve.

7. Don't check out other people when you're on a date. Ever. This is just tacky. You may think you are subtle, but while you're scoping the cutie in the corner, your date will be heading for the door. Extend your partner the courtesy of concentrating solely on them while you're with them.

8. Don't be rude or get drunk on a date. Courtesy and manners will get you everywhere.

9. Don't ignore your personal safety. Carry your cell phone and keep it charged -- and make sure to tell your friends where you're going and when you'll be back. First dates should take place in well-lit public places. Don't ever let yourself be coerced into going anywhere or doing anything that makes you uncomfortable.

10. Don't give out personal information like your home phone number or address on the first date. Keep these details to yourself until you trust the person you're dating.

11. Don't have sex on a first date. If you like someone and are interested in getting to know them better (and possibly having a relationship), sex on a first date will likely ruin everything. It's much too soon, it's not romantic and it communicates to the other person that you're more interested in their physical characteristics than in finding out who they are.

12. Never date a married person. Statistically, it is very unlikely that they will ever leave their husband or wife for you. Dating someone who's married is the best way to serve yourself a heaping helping of misery, lies, deceit, sadness and heartache. If you are married, separate before dating. If you're single, don't be a shoulder to cry on -- you deserve better. Go out and find someone who's emotionally (and legally) available to you!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Boundaries in Dating: Making Dating Work


Product Description

Boundaries in Dating provides a way to think, solve problems, and enjoy the benefits of dating in the fullest way, including increasing the ability to find and commit to a marriage partner.

From the Publisher

Dating can be fun, but it's not easy. Meeting people is just one concern. Once you've met someone, then what? What do you build? Nothing, a simple friendship, or more? How do you set smart limits on physical involvement? Financial involvement? Individual responsibilities? Respected counselors, popular radio hosts, and best-selling authors Henry Cloud and John Townsend apply the principles described in their Gold Medallion Award-winning Boundaries to matters of love and romance. Helping readers bridge the pitfalls of dating, Boundaries in Dating unfolds a wise, biblical path to developing self-control, freedom, and intimacy in the dating process. Boundaries in Dating helps singles to think, solve problems, and enjoy the benefits of dating to the hilt, increasing their abilities to find and commit to a marriage partner. Liberally illustrated with insightful, true-life examples, this much-needed book includes such topics as: Sins You Can Live With--Recognizing and choosing quality over perfection in a dating partner - Don't Fall in Love with Someone You Wouldn't Be Friends With--How to ensure that honest friendship is one vital component in a relationship - Don't Screw Up a Friendship Out of Loneliness--Preserving friendships by separating between platonic relationships and romantic interest - Kiss False Hope Good-Bye--Moving past denial to deal with real relational problems in a realistic and hopeful way . . . and much more.

Dating for Geeks

The essential guide to love for intelligent young men. Written by a geek, for geeks, this book covers all the basics of dating and focuses on building a broad base of social skills. Great niche! No one needs dating help more than geeks!


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Regular Dating

Regular dating is the most popular type of dating. This is because most people like the intimacy of being alone with their significant other.

Regular dating is going out with your date alone without other people coming along. Many people like to include dinner and something to do afterwards like the theatre, a concert, or dancing.

Everyone has a different idea of what they believe is romantic. Dinner might be at a fine dining restaurant and the two of you will get dressed up. Some people consider a home cooked meal by candlelight dinner the romantic way to dine on a date.

This can be the best way to go if you don’t have a lot of money to go out but you want to do something special. In addition, when you cook a meal for your date there is more thought and effort put into it and some people enjoy it much more than they do being treated to a fine restaurant.

The regular dating experience gives you the opportunity to get to know your date on a more personal level than when you are out with other people.

You can spend the evening talking and enjoying each other. If you are not comfortable with an intimate dating experience on the first date then you might not want to go alone on the first date. You might consider
a double or a group date.

Regular dating gives you the opportunity to get to know your date on a personal level. Usually, a regular date will consist of lunch or dinner together and finding something to do afterwards. Regular dating is the preferred method of dating for most people because of the attention and the intimacy.

Dating Supercharge!!!

A unique product for the Dating advice market - these 'Binaural Beat' Brainwave audios offer your visitors an automatic solution to their confidence issues.


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Every Young Man's Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation [VHS]

Every Young Man's Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation [VHS]Sexual temptation. It's everywhere you look. On TV, in the movies, on the Internet. And sometimes it feels like you can't escape its clutches. But God wants his children to be sexually pure.
How?

Here's powerful ammunition from two counselors on the front lines: Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker. It's the companion to their challenging book, Every Young Man's Battle. And it's all about how to guard your eyes and your minds every moment of every day. How to handle the guilt God's way. How to clean up your thought life. And how to develop a battle plan that really works even in the sex-drenched culture you live in.
 Price: $19.99

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Dating Etiquette

When you go on a date there are certain things and ways you should behave. Of course you want the person to get to know you so you shouldn’t try and be someone that you are not.

When you go out on a date you should look and dress nice. This will show the other person you care about your appearance but you also care about what they think about you. If you don’t care about what the other person thinks then you probably shouldn’t be going out on a date with them.

Depending on the person you are taking out you should also remember to open the car doors and all doors for your date.

If the woman you are going out with is a feminist, then let her open the doors and do things for herself or it will bother her. She also will want to pay for her own meal.

If you are not going on a date with an independent woman who is a feminist then you should open the doors, be on time when you pick her up, and be prepared to pay for the entire date.

Don’t take your date somewhere you cannot afford and never find yourself asking your date for money to cover the bill.

Dating etiquette also includes not making the other person feel as if they are on an interview. It is common for people on a date to ask many questions and they just want to get to know the other person.

However, don’t make them feel as if they are on an interview or you might scare them off. Be sure to create a comfortable atmosphere.

Dating Tips & Relationship Advice

Learn the secrets to dating success. Get answers and expert advice on love, attraction, dating and relationships. Dating tips and relationship advice for men and women.


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(500) Days of Summer

(500) Days of SummerTom, a romantic greeting card writer, thinks that Summer is the girl of his dreams, but she does not believe that true love exists.

Price: $29.98


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Making Dates More Enjoyable and Fun

Most people are usually nervous when it comes to their first dates. This can make you look like someone who had taken gallons of coffee before the date.

Long silence is always between your conversations with your date, and you are hoping to come up with a few funny lines that can crack the ice.

But sometimes, you’re too late because your date has decided to spend her time with someone else.

Usually, first dates are spent in places where you can sit and talk with your date in order to know each other better. Some go to the movies, have some coffee at the local coffee house, or dine in an expensive restaurant so as to impress their dates.

Dates like these just need a little jump-start to be more effective. Try adding some adventure or do a set of
enjoyable activities together in order to have fun with your dates.

Some men take their dates to an adventurous place. They go to a few local destinations or historical places within the area. They go around these places whilst having so much to see and many things to talk about. These are times when you don’t need a funny line to break the silence.

In case of rain, you can’t go out and have a walk at the local park or other outdoor spots conducive for talking and knowing each other better.

On the brighter side of things, you can go indoors. Try some shopping malls. There, you can find a wide variety of places to have some coffee. Drinking coffee doesn’t take four hours or so of sitting and doing nothing since you can talk to your date and get to know her better.

After some time, try inviting your date for a walk at the mall. Go shop for small things with her such as clothes and CDs.

Save some time to go bowling, play video games, or find a bookstore to share your interests with her. The main idea is to interact with your date in order to know her better. This will surely provide you with a means to bolster your chances of landing a date that can lead to love and romance in the long run.

With this in mind, go and check out places near you for fun activities you and your date will surely enjoy.

The Online Dating Bible eBook

A growing online dating industry and men who need help with it makes this niche very lucrative. And the book basically sells itself. Very low refund rates.


Check it out!

Christian Dating: The Shocking Truth [VHS]

Designed to bring balance to the issue of teen sexuality by promoting self-respect, responsibility, marital fidelity, virtue, and self-control, this video program is infused with the Christian world view and speaks to the value of saving oneself for biblical marriage. 30 minutes.

Price: $14.99


Click here to buy from Amazon

Problems With Dating

Most dating problems occur because either the two of you are not compatible or you are not communicating enough. Other problems may be because the two of you just are not right for each other.

Communication is the most important thing when you are dating. Most problems occur because the two of you are having difficulty expressing your feelings or you aren’t being clear about what you want.

When you both communicate with each other properly it is clear to both of you if you are compatible and have
the same likes and dislikes.

You cannot force a relationship if the two of you are too different or you have different goals for the relationship.

It is important to communicate about what you need and want from your relationship so you both are satisfied and you are not having disagreements about things.

Another thing that can cause problems with dating is if the two of you are not compatible. Communicating properly will tell you if you are or not.

Compatibility can be difficult if one person in the relationship is needier than the other person. If one of the people wants their space and the other is very needy then it can make it difficult for dating.

Dating problems occur when communication skills are not up to par. You have to be comfortable with the person you are with so you can talk to them.

Being comfortable and being able to communicate will show you how compatible the two of you are. If you don’t have these two things then you might just consider a good friendship.